What do I Want? (Rant...)

I've seen other doll owners struggle with this as well and I just read it wisely said that you should really collect just for yourself, not minding about the perceived expectations of others. It's not like many of us realle even care what dolls others have or how well formed their characters are or are their dolls in scale and all that. I know I just look at other people's dolls for the pretty pictures, not really caring if its wearing something ooc or not. And I don't really know what your character is supposed to look like so who am I to judge if your doll is a good reflection of it or not?

So why is it so damn hard for me to just give up on certain character dolls and just get the things I really want?

Don't get me wrong, this isn't about Nigel this time. I'm really looking forward to hi arriving and I hope he'll stay for good this time. I don't have such a need to keep photographing my dolls anymore, especially in winter when I acn't take photos anyway and especially the big ones, so I don't care if he'll look basically the same all the time :D He'll be for cuddling!

This is about that Saiph head I'm waiting to be released. And dreading about. The obvious purpose for getting that head would be to reshell Manna as SD!Audrye. But what I'd really want to do with the head is to have a sort of chic SD!Hani. I'd make it wear extravagantly pastel wigs (like that Crobi wig I hope they release), every kind of casual pastel clothes and cutest shoes. Now you might ask (or won't if you're like me and don't really care about the doll characters of others... ;) ) how does that not make it Audrye?

Audrye might do wigs for special occasions, but mainly she'd have her default golden hair. She'd have the make-up that she usually has. She'd be named Audrye. I'm actually entertaining myself with the idea that I'd name Saiph as Vivi Vanille.

So what's stopping me? ... Well, I have no character Vivi Vanille. Yes, I didn't have characters Eiko, Yuffie or Alex either before I got the dolls, but now there doesn't seem to be room for a Vivi there. And ever since I ordered SD!Nikki and decided to sell mini!Manna I feel slightly obligated to get an SD!Audrye. And I know it makes no sense! I just hear as friends say that they'll miss her and if I got her as SD we could take group photos and all that. And I feel a tinge.

And this is making me slightly anxious, since I would need to decide pretty quickly what I really want. If I want an audrye, there's the perfect wig for her on sale at Leeke. And I think it's limited, although for sale until end of December. It's the same wig I'm thinking of getting for both Eiko and Fyrd as well. It's just that goodlooking a wig! But if I get a vivi, I can just wait out for a Crobi wig or Leeke two-toned event. Of course I could still get neat pastel wigs even if I get Audrye, but I wouldn't want to spend my money on her golden wig if I don't have to... I'm already spenging quite a lot on dolls in a short period of time.

:P Well, it helped getting that all out at least...