I Need Sleeping Pills

It shouldn't come as a surprise to my friends that I often remember my dreams. I've practised it since youth and if I wake up during a dream I instantly go over it and hence remember it quite well. And nowadays I can't un-remember them. And I'd really, really like to, since my dreams are not that happy-happy-joy-joy care bears and my little ponies -dreams. They are disturbing, scary and unpleasant. And you wonder why I can be neurotic some times...



Like last night... My dream starts as my character (it's not really me, but I can see through her eyes) being an undercover cop in a beuty pagent. Yes, quite like Miss Congeniality. I've just rushed in to the dressing hall after getting some vital clue in solving the brutal murders. I barely manage to get into my long black evening dress when we have to get on stage. I get one of the other girls to zip me up (and strangely she looks like one of my friends from UTU) but I don't have time for my shoes. So I tiptoe to the stage without them. Well, I don't have much time to be embarassed about it, since the pageant host is actually the murderer and I point my pistol at him telling him that it's over.

We enter a flashback scene about the time when this pageant host, Nathaniel (played in my dream by Kevin Costner since this is like Mr. Brooks), becomes a serial killer. Nathaniel is the heir to an old and wealthy family that holds this pageant every year or so. He has a few younger sisters and in this flashback it is revealed that he had a younger brother 15 years younger than him. But when this brother, Aurelios, is about 6 years old and the two are playing or hiking in the family estate woods (during winter or late autumn) suddenly Nathaniel pierces Aurelios through the back with a brach of wood. the other end comes through the little boys stomach. He curles, his older brother picks him up, tosses him away a few meters and then sets the dying boy into flames. And then, Nathaniel paint the picture of his younger brother's agonizing face on a canvas surrounded by flames. In his madness (or cleverness, I don't quite get it) Nathaniel writes on the canvas a doomsday prophecy quoting biblical sentences and threatening to kill again.

Well, Nathaniel hadn't killed according to his prophecy, yet, but he had killed in other ways and had multiple victims. In this pageant he had planned to finally fulfill his prophecy. But I got him first. And then I reveal how I had figured this out. I had researched old photos of his family and noticed a young boy in some of them, half hiding behing his mother's skirts or something else. Aurelios had been erased from family histories but his photos were still there. And Nathaniel confessed.

The stranger twists about this dream were that those family photos were very old, in black and white and looked like 100 years old, although the actual first murder had occured maybe 20 years ago. Also after finding the boy in the first picture with his mother, I found him in every picture I looked at. I even looked at a group photo of my friends (in real life, although such a photo has never been taken) and suddenly the boy appeared in the photo, his head blocking half the crowd. Some sort of ghost photos they were...

The thing is, I can clearly see that painting of an agonizing young face surrounded by flames. If I had any skill with paints I think I could remake it. And I don't want dying little boys in my head! If I tell this to a doctor can I get sleeping pills to fade away my dreams or will they just send me to the psych ward?